The Dice Date

On Paper:

Leaving love to chance with the role of a dice. Could my date’s adventurous (dangerous) idea lead to love at first sight?

giphy-21

In Reality:

In terms of romantic openers his left a lot to be desired:

“I think I swiped right on you in the midst of a furious swipe right on everyone binge.”

tense

“…But I’m glad I did. Debbie – I have an idea.”

giphy-10

 

“Once a year my two oldest friends and I go on a night out on which our every decision is decided by the roll of a dice called Howard. It could be the best, could be the worst night of your life. The dice decides…”

Oh my god…

giphy-9

“You in Debbie?”

giphy-20


I arrived at Waterloo station – adrenaline pumping, excited for what the night (not date – we’d had one conversation) held. We met at a bar and took our seats. He was friendly, polite and eased my fear of what I thought could be in his pocket.

 

92da213cf66c7a381074db1e12b26585

Then he introduced me to Howard (I breathed a sigh of relief)

14608083_10211674181676272_2055835887_n

And explained the game.

“Debbie, each number will initially represent a different area in London.”

“OK”

“And then when we get to each location, each number will mean which bar we go to – i.e if you roll a two, you have to go to the second bar/club/off licence (anywhere that serves alcohol) you come across.”

“OK”

“Once you get into the bar, the numbers will represent which drink. So, 3 – beer, 5 – spirits, 4 – cider etc. Understand?”

yep-owary6

“But there is only one rule. You must never go against Howard the dice.”

 

tumblr_n0wxtua8mk1rkk59qo1_400-1423846877-1

 

So the game began and I rolled…

“I got two!”

“Roll it again.”

“But you said-“

“Two means we have to stay in Waterloo station Debbie – just roll.”
14569806_10211681880948749_445242375_n

My second roll was three: Soho.

We gathered our belongings and made our way to the tube, when my date was suddenly thwarted at the barriers!

“Why the isn’t my bank card working?! Pretty sure there is at least £2.80 on there!?”

“It’s Howard. He knows we cheated!”

“Debbie, this is actually quite worrying -”

“Just use mine – the commuters are coming!!!

cvznet

We boarded our train. I tried to ignore the nagging feeling that Howard was aware of our deception (whilst my date actually shat himself that he’d been robbed):

“Debbie, what if someone has stolen all my money?”

“It’s Howard. He’s behind this.”

“I don’t think a dice has taken-”

DON’T ANGER HIM ANYMORE THAN YOU ALREADY HAVE.”

acev_zpsff90e5e6-gifc200

We arrived at our first destination:

“Right Debbie you need to roll again: Evens – Turn right. Odds – Turn left”

My clinically short attention span began kicking in.

“Ergh. This is so long…”

qh14c

“Just roll it.”

In Soho the possibilities were endless – stylish boutique bars, so fashion and glam.

So Howard took us here.

garfunkels_-_argyll_street_near_oxford_circus_london_4075867203

Where my date got the first round (his bank card miraculously working again when the dice rolled for a small glass of house white). 

giphy-17

We quickly left for our second location where it was my turn to buy the drinks as my date apologised profusely; “Debbie, I swear I would never usually take a girl there”.

Whilst I quietly prayed to Howard.

14593150_10211674887373914_1699668575_n

We walked down the streets counting the bars as we went, and arrived at the fifth bar.

OH FOR FUCK SAKE

hippodrome-casino

We headed inside towards the bar and rolled the dice which landed on spirits (obviously).

“Two gin and tonics please.”

“Would you like doubles or singles Madame?”

“Do you do halves?”

“DEBBIE!!”

14580316_10211674382281287_157816942_n

And took our seats at the blackjack table, where I put my life savings on the line…

“Mr Casino, I would like to bet one pound on 28, black.”

“Debbie you can’t bet one pound!”

“Fine. Mr Casino – make that…”

giphy-11

I lost and turned on my date.

“YOU OWE ME TWO POUNDS!”

“You rolled the dice?!”

“YES. BUT YOU WENT AGAINST HOWARD AND THAT DICE WAS PROBABLY HIS COUSIN.”

giphy-14

My date rolled a six which led us to an underground bar, and I rolled to decide our drink…

…Poison
14593433_10211673044847852_1428859178_n

“Can we get two double vodka oranges.”

“Sure.”

“Also what time do you guys shut?”

“We’re open till 4am tonight.”

“BABE LET’S GET SHOTS!!”

y-n

The vodka began flowing (tidal waving) and I began making my own dangerous decisions.

I’m going to take my bra off, roll up my jumper and thrust on the dance floor.

“Fucking hell Debbie?!!”

“What?”

“It’s time to go home!!”

“NO!!

giphy-15

“Seriously Debbie your taxi is here. Do you have any idea where you live?!”

 

1bt5b7


Cost: Depends if you are eternally cursed from smashing mirrors in a past life.

Dangerous Rating:

A fantastic 10 out of 10 evening!

For what would be the finale of Howard’s torment…

I awoke on a cold hard floor the following morning; confused, naked, alone (bonus) when I heard yelling:

“DEBBIE GET READY I’VE GOT TO LEAVE FOR WORK IN 5 MINUTES!!”

14593383_10211682235557614_240842474_n

Now Debbie! Also I can’t find Howard, is he with you?”

batu7bl


8 hours earlier…

“THIS IS THE BEST NIGHT EVER!!!”

“Debbie seriously, where is your bra?!”

“WHERE IS YOUR SENSE OF FUN!?”

“Right it’s your round. Roll Howard.”

“Really?”

 

tumblr-inline-mkzptyaqwk1qz4rgp

I panicked.

I’m not proud of myself.

But I had no other option.

14620019_10211682162515788_167478047_n

 

 

2 Comments

  1. Taiwo Obileye

    After 9 years of being in a relationship, I’ve now found myself having to date for the first time ever. Your postings leave me with feelings of fear and excitement… mainly fear.

    Liked by 1 person

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s